23 May 2001 
 
Ugh. 
 
I'm sitting at xpub7, a fancy dumb terminal (as in, I've got X-windows on 
this baby, but it's running it off of quixote, one of Courant's beleagured 
servers); its keyboard has the s, d, and l keys completely rubbed off, 
and the others are well on their way.  The guy who is in charge of 
providing students with keys is gone for the day, and I wonder if he'll be 
back at all anytime this week.  Damn. 
 
So, let's see.  This morning Brenda got her very own "New York City 
experience" in that we walked up and then down a long escalator we didn't 
have to, she learned that there are very few public toilets in NYC (but 
also very many McDonald's, so we had only to go around a very small block 
to find one), and then with little more incident we found the bus stop (I 
had noted a Q33 as Brenda went into the McD;s and I followed where it 
went.  It can be very tough to find the proper bus stop once one leaves a 
subway station.)  I don't count losing one's airplane ticket as a NYC 
experience, as that can happen anywhere.  Still, even though I was there, 
I don't really count it as one of my NYC experiences.  It's nowhere close 
to my ultimate one of moving into my Flushing apt., and can't hold a 
candle to Stu's & my run-in with a down-and-out stand-up comic in Central 
Park.  (Those eyes....) 
 
Speaking of which, here's a quote from an unnamed source who often thinks 
about geometry and population control issues:  "I'll tell you why there's 
no overpopulation problem -- the universe is expanding." 
 
I couldn't help myself, but I thought I'd mention that as far as we can 
tell, it's expanding now.  But we're still not quite sure if it will keep 
doing so.  So you still can't reproduce willy-nilly.   
 
Moral Grounds - the newest brand of coffee from the Benedictine monks... 
 
Ok, so I had my little tangent on different reasons for people to eat or 
to not eat certain foods.  I have made the argument for fruitarians, and 
it's pretty much what I had mentioned before (note to myself - I need to 
make a transcript of the anti-fruit tirade from MAAKIES) -- oooh, and 
something odd is going on as they allow the eating of seeds, nuts, grains, 
beans... (all of which are really seeds).. which is really most of the 
non-animal part of my diet.  This is interesting to me - think about it - 
one is killing the plants to eat spinach, celery, etc. - one has taken a 
vital part (the stem, the root, or the leaves).  But if one takes the 
fruit, which is made intentionally for the spread of seed, that is 
obviously not hurting the plant.  =However= they also seem to feel that 
eating the seeds so that it doesn't reproduce is not harming the plant.   
Mmmmhmmm - it's that attitude that let's people think using embryonic or 
fetal cells from voluntary abortions is okay...  Or that forced 
sterilization is not torture....  Hell, these people also say it's okay to 
eat eggs from free-range chickens!  Ok, I need to find some fruitarians 
who are a little more hard-core. 
 
I'm sorry, but plants don't produce seeds so that others can eat them, 
though I have heard funny theories about the reason why acorns are yummy 
to squirrels.  You see, having yummy seeds (as opposed to fruits which 
are, by botanical definition, the ripened ovaries of a plant) can benefit 
the plant if you have an animal which will take the seeds away, and 
effectively plant them.  Because, you see, squirrels do hide nuts in the 
ground and they also forget about alot of the nuts they plant...   
 
And if we want to get =really= picky, many of the fruits we eat don't 
really "want" us to eat them as the seeds generally end up in the trash as 
opposed to good soil.   
 
Okay, that's the serious part.  Now to the ridiculous part (aren't I 
polite?  I signal people when I'm starting some satire.... no, I prefer 
not to.  I hate what Thackeray did with Vanity Fair.  Dammit, you already 
=showed= what Becky was doing!  You don't have to run editorial commentary 
as it goes along!  You git!) 
 
So I think those who are strict with regards to sexual morality should 
eschew fruit, as #1) we are eating the genitals of a plant (by this 
argument, one would also be forbidden the use of saffron, and some other 
spices which derive from plant reproductive organs) and we all know 
genitals are naughty; and #2) we are part of an interspecies reproductive 
act in spreading seed, also obviously verboten.  Now one can't forestall 
these objections by saying the seed will not find fertile ground as one 
will throw the seeds away (or digest them, in which it will end up in the 
sewage), as one is simply contributing to the sin of Onanism.  Destroying 
seed is obviously wrong, as the Catholic Church says it is sinful to 
interfere with another's fertility (well, and one's own as well, but 
that's a different category of sin).  Don't eat fruit; those with 
plant concupiscence shall surely go to Hell.   
 
I was trying to think of a word to describe the kind of person who refuses 
to eat fruit  (though we don't really have a word for people who avoid 
=any= particular food -- vegetarian, fruitarian, omnivore, herbivore, 
carnivore, all these indicate what the people =do= eat) -- 
afrugivore?  misofruitist?  Cookie for a good word.... 
 
Anyway, I love fruit.  But then I was always a hussy.